Getting old...what now?

During Fridays class I began to ponder the life of my own grandparents. All four still alive but living very different lives. My grandmother on my mother's side was diagnosed with Alzheimer when I was in kindergarten. My mother's dad has had multiple surgeries on his back, has trouble walking, and is in constant pain. We grew up from this set of grandparents till about seventh grade for me until we moved away. After we moved away they knew they needed to leave nearby one of their children so they moved to Texas next to my Aunt. My family and I visited every summer to visit and help out with things. It was getting very hard on my grandpa to take care of my grandma. She was heading downhill fast with alzheimers and was beginning to run away from the house. One day she ran away and by the time my grandfather could catch up with her she was on the ground. He tried to pick her up but was too week and sore to help her. This was a turning point for my grandpa, he knew he needed help. They lived in a huge home that was hard for him to get around with plenty of places for my grandma to hide. It was then that as a family we decided that an nurses home is where grandma needed to go. We moved them both to a facility that had a more advanced nursing staff for my grandma and an assisted living side for my grandpa and his dog to stay. My grandma's room is through some doors down the hallway so that he can visit her everyday. It is hard for him to live in this retirement home but he knows that it is much better than how his life was going in Texas. As a family we need to make sure he feels loved and remembered, visiting him often.

This compared to my other set of grandparents that have served one mission in Texas and two service missions are more active than ever. They have a lovely home in Utah that my grandma is constantly cleaning. They know this is a good place for them because they have control of their bodies and their actions. It is sad sometimes to put elderly in nursing homes but depending on the circumstances it can be for the best. Just remember to include them in the decision and make sure you do not forget about them.

Parenting

Disciplining a child shows love to a child. I know that is weird sounding to some but if you look deeper you can understand more. Structure is one thing children crave and it is a parents' responsibility to fulfill that need for a child. Using natural and logical consequences can help build that structure. Making logical consequences get the child involved in what the consequence should be for a certain behavior in order to give the responsibility to the child. Also make sure that the consequence is one that is logical connected to the behavior. Natural consequences are ones that happen naturally in nature. For example if you do not study for your test, naturally you are going to get a bad grade.

When Natural Consequences is not the answer:
1. Danger!
2. Lesson too far off
3. Affecting someone else

"I" Messages
When you ____________________
I feel ________________________
Because _____________________
I would like ___________________

This can feel awkward at first but gets the message across clearly. This method can be used instead of blaming a person directly. You are being critical of the behavior instead of a person.